The Adam's Family Home-coming

As we come closer to completing our time here, and we think more and more of coming 'home' to the UK, it seems that more and more of you have also been thinking of us, and we have had a few emails asking how we are, and whether we have any prayer requests...

Oh dear, what a glib subject heading I have chosen, and how often I have cringed when I have heard the same line from someone else... all the while maintaining a forced smile!!!! It's like when people ask me "where's Eve?" I've taken to trying to come out with some witty reply, something like "she's out gathering apples" or "picking fig-leaves". It feels like that comes across better than a forced smile to me, and I think it puts people on the back foot, as they work out what I'm talking about!!??

Isn't communication a funny thing. I think that the basic problem is that inside all of us we desperately want to be understood, and to be able to understand others. We all have a child inside that is easily hurt, easily offended. We all have our protective mechanisms, and our barriers we put up.

In scripture it says that in Heaven we will "fully understand, even as we are fully understood". It is talking about a time when we will no longer only be able to perceive and relate with our bodily senses, and our gesture and voice. I think it will be nice to be able to greet one another in a spirit of full understanding and acceptance. There will be no more pretences, no more awkward silences. No forced smiles. We will all be on a level playing field, and all loved unconditionally. There will be no more hurting child inside. No more insecurity...

With reference again to the awful "Adam's Family" title above, my family are not really mine at all. I like to think of everything I have belonging to God, my wife, my children, my money, my property, my car, my job, my health, my talents, my medical degree. I think of them all as gifts from God in my care for only a short time. The story of the talents in the bible suggests that to the person who has been given much, more will be expected.

Being in India has certainly helped me to be able to count my blessings. As I look around me at the poverty and disease, the starving children, the people around me so often every day have really nothing compared to my opulent existence. We are thinking about moving back to the UK, and as we prepare, we have been looking at homes to buy on the net. When we do a quick calculation of how much money we are thinking of spending in Indian Rupees on a house it seems so wrong. It seems there is no balance to the world, and that there is really a crazy difference to the "haves", and the "have nots".

All of you in the West, whether rich or poor, fat or thin, employed or un-employed, well fed or living on baked beans on toast;

"count your blessings. Name them one by one, then you'll realise what the Lord has done". You will never suffer as I have seen people suffer.

I would like to include a small passage here from a monthly letter that my boss Andi produces each month. He is very eloquent with the written word;

"Overwhelmed. That’s what we so often feel like when we see the sheer needs of our dear friends with HIV – and their often maddeningly broken relationships.

A small 8 year old girl lies in a government hospital in a semi-coma. She has fits and has been vomiting. Her parents take turns to be with her HIV positive daughter. The two younger siblings – 4 and 1 year old are with their grandmother – but the mother needs to see them occasionally. The father drives his auto-rickshaw during the day – and then comes to spend time with his daughter. The family has been so much – and the agony of looking after their beloved little girl is heart-breaking. We had been encouraging this family to start her on anti-retroviral medication for so long – and they only started recently. It looks like it may be too late.

A woman lies in her shack – too tired and feverish to get up. Her husband – HIV positive like her - has left her and gone back to his village. Her teenaged son comes in at odd hours and is said to be stealing things at night – couldn’t care less about his mother. The two smallest kids have already ‘grown up’ - the 5 year old wanders about outside not listening to what her mother tells her. The three year old is inside crying for food. Both girls also have HIV ticking away in their small bodies.

A grown man lies at home – unable to get up because of his constant diarrhoea. His wife – HIV positive like him – finally decides that she must admit him or he will die. He is brought to JSK with virtually no pulse. During the process of admission we realise that the other relatives have never been told that his wife is also positive."...
...count your blessings...

So about us! Here goes...

...We are really becoming more and more home-sick, as our move back to the UK becomes more imminent.

Please pray for us to be able to remain focussed on the task in hand here in India for a little while longer... some of the things we are involved with follow, and you can pray for these things specifically...

Jo Has been getting involved one or two mornings a week with a pre-school in a local slum. However she is frustrated that nothing changes on the days she is not there, and she wants to meet with the leaders to instigate changes that will make the pre-school a better place long-term, even after we have left.

Jo has also has been asked to help prepare a teaching syllabus for teachers in Indian schools to improve their english. Jo has a "Teaching English as a second language" qualification. She is feeling like there aren't enough hours in the day, and also hasn't used her training in this field for 11 years, and so is almost starting from scratch. Thank God for Liz, who has recently started volunteering with the organisation preparing the syllabus, and who will be able to do a lot of the hard work.

Pray that Jo continues to do a great job of being a mum as well. It has been harder here away from friends and supports. She really is fantastic at it. Someone once commented to me that Jo's job here in India is much harder than mine. That is so true.

Leading on from that, it would be great if I was a better support to my wife!

Other things to consider for me are my two main roles in work. I continue to work for Jeevan Sahara Kendra 3 days a week, but for the past few months I have also been involved 2 days a week with a new 'health-care centre' run by oasis India. Oasis are keen to get another full-time doctor to work there, to take over after I leave.

On a more abstract note, I have started writing a book. It is a work of fiction about a family in India with HIV. It aims to discuss some of the issues involved in Indian culture and society. It probably won't be any good, but pray I get time to work on it! It will be a nice record even for me, when I return.

I am also airing the thought of starting a charity when I return! What do you think? I have seen a great need in India for charities who really struggle for decent premesis. Often the right type of premesis simply isn't available, but also, rent agreements in India are generally for 11 months only due to a law giving tennants certain rights if they are in a premesis for more than 12 months. I would like my charity to buy properties for well established fruitful charities with proper registration, and boards of trustees. I would not feel it was worth the risk of supporting charities just starting out, or those in the hands of an individual, as this would be more open to corruption and fraud.

Pray for Alistair and Freya's health. For a couple of days they have been having unexplained stomach pains, without diarrhoea or vomiting. They have not been sleeping well, and so we are all tired. Help me to know the best way to treat them medically.

In terms of coming back to the UK, please pray for that to go smoothly. We have sold our flat in Dumbarton Road!! - an end of an era fro Jo and I. I have owned that flat since I was 19, and it has been one of the things which has enabled us to come to India, with income from rent being a great help. Please pray for Alistair to get admission to the school of our choice. Please pray that we get a house with a nice garden when we het back!!!! Neither of us have ever had a garden!! For the kids this would be a great thing. At times here in India it has been too dusty and dirty, or too wet, or too hot for them to play outside here, and at times they go a bit stir-crazy cooped up in our flat!!

Pray for all our practical arrangements, flights, shipping, travel, goodbyes... etc... etc... Above all pray as you feel led by God's spirit- "All types of prayers on all occassions"!!